One afternoon, Mogey and Smush meandered on down to the river to fetch a couple pails of water from the village pump house. Smush pumped the handle as Mogey stared absentmindedly at the stream of water pouring into his wooden bucket, wondering if petting toads did indeed give you warts (and if so why his hands and neck weren't covered in them).
Suddenly, a very strange thing happened. The water erupting from the spigot turned bright purple. Curious lad that he was, Mogey bent down and took a sip of the purple liquid.
"Good gracious!" Mogey exclaimed. "This isn't water at all - it's pirate's punch!"
He bent back over the stream and began guzzling pirate's punch as fast as it would come out. Then he pumped for a while to give Smush his turn.
"Delicious!" Smush cried after his first sip. "An otherworldly delight! How is this possible?"
They went on like that, switching pumpers every so often, for over half an hour, until finally they were interrupted by the arrival of Cheddar Bogstaff, the chubbiest, sloppiest, smelliest man in the district.
"Ahoy fellahs," Cheddar Bogstaff said, waddling over. He was toweling himself off and Mogey and Smush both noticed a lack of his usual fragrance. "I just had me my first bath in 2 months! Had to scrub pretty hard too. See these shorts?" he asked, pointing to the white pair of cutoffs he was wearing. "They was purple when I got in the river just now."
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