Step after torturous step the pals climbed. Hour after harrowing hour they slogged. All the way up to the tip top of the public walking path nicknamed E-Z Strider by the Department of Parks and Recreation.
"False advertising," Smush panted as they reached the pinnacle. "Not one of those strides was E-Z."
"The Department of Parks and Recreation should be ashamed," Mogey agreed. "But look: we made it."
For under the tree just ahead of them sat a wizened man with a crow perched upon his shoulder.
"Pergola the Sage," whispered Mogey.
The pals walked forward and sat cross-legged before the honored elder.
"O most ancient and wise Pergola," Smush began.
"Most WHAT and wise Pergola?" Pergola exclaimed.
"Erm... O most wise Pergola..."
"Better," said Pergola.
"We come seeking your opinion on a question to which my friend and I simply cannot reach consensus," Smush continued. "If a pig were to walk through a puddle so deep that his belly touched the water... what would he do?"
"He'd freak out, right?" Mogey added. Smush elbowed him.
Pergola considered for a moment. His crow cawed several times.
"Well," said the reputed guru, "what would you do if you were to walk through a puddle so deep that your belly touched the water?"
"Freak out," Mogey replied.
While at the same time Smush said, "not much at all." The two pals looked at each other and grinned.
"You see?" Pergola intoned. "The question is not of the pig, but of yourselves."
"No," said Mogey, "I mean - the question literally was about a pig. You see we have these big potholes in our dooryard, and Sir Oinks-a-lot keeps breaking out of his sty, and I'm just real worried he's going to freak out."
Pergola shrugged. "Pergola the Sage has spoken," he concluded.
"Can I ask you one more thing?" Smush requested. "Does the crow, like, help you come up with your answers?"
"Crow?" asked Pergola.
"Yes, that's right - the crow on your shoulder. I noticed he made some noises when you were considering our question."
"There is no crow on my--" said Pergola, turning his head. "AGHHHHHHHH!" he screamed when he caught sight of the bird.
"CAWWWWWW!" screamed the crow.
"AGHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Mogey and Smush.
"AGHHHHHHHHH!" screamed the class of nursery school students who happened to be walking by on E-Z Strider.
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