"Whatever is wrong, Mogey?" Smush exclaimed, seeing his pal emerge from the kitchen, weeping uncontrollably.
"Oh nothing," said Mogey with a sniff, "I've just chopped a vast quantity of onions. But now what's the matter with you?"
"I'm sorry!" Smush blubbered. "A vast quantity of any vegetable fills me with sorrow and dread."
"Don't worry, Smush ol' buddy, it's a vast quantity of onions to make an even vaster quantity of cheesesteaks."
At this pronouncement, Smush broke into even more hysterical tears.
"What is it now?" Mogey asked.
"Tears of joy!" Smush howled.
"What is all this racket? Are you both... crying?" demanded Mug Tuffins, the third resident of the pals' humble abode. Mug worked part time as a bouncer at McKishi's, the Irish pub catering exclusively to sumo wrestlers. "Stop it this instant! There is no excuse for whinging and whining - none whatsoever!"
"Oh yeah?" Mogey whimpered (he had joined Smush in crying tears of joy at the prospect of vaster quantities of cheesesteaks).
"Yeah!" Mug Tuffins confirmed.
"What if... what if silver screen legend Champ Rawhide leaves you a voicemail telling you he's proud of you?" Mogey suggested.
Mug Tuffins did not respond, but even contemplating such a voicemail caused a single tear to spill down his cheek.
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