Monday, February 7, 2011

The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush Volume 499

"I want to be in the band too!" Mogey cried, stomping his foot stubbornly. "You've already got four band members, what's one more?"

Mogey's pleading was met by looks of consternation from Smush's band, The Dumplings, who had gathered down in the cellar to practice. There was Chuck "Pignose" Buddle on drums, Slender Frankie in fiddle, Leopold "The Actuary" Akron on lead guitar, and Smush himself on tambourine.

"I'm sorry Mogey, but you haven't got any talent," Smush explained. "How can we include you when you don't sing, or write music, or play an instrument?"

"That's where you're wrong," Mogey replied. "I do play an instrument - a very unusual one. And what's more, I'm so skilled at this particular instrument that it'll be like having Bernie Montgomery playing harpsichord in your band."

"Who's Bernie Montgomery?" Leopold "The Actuary" Akron asked.

"A very good harpsichord player," said Mogey.

"All right then," Smush said with a sigh, "let's see you play this instrument."

Mogey held up a hand for complete silence, then proceeded to extract a bag of crackers from his back pocket. He crammed his mouth full of these crackers, and began to loudly and enthusiastically crunch them to the tune of When the Saints Go Marching In.

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