"Mogey! Mogey! Come quickly!" Smush shrieked.
Mogey stumbled into the kitchen to find his pal robed in a robe, fresh out of the Saturday night bath barrel, and looking more anguished than a zookeeper who realizes the monkeys and sea lions have teamed up, and are just one bird ally away from launching a full air, sea, and land attack.
"What is it?" Mogey exclaimed.
"My hands! They're all... raison-like. Do ye think it's fatal?"
"For the love of mustard, Smush! How long has it been since you've had a bath?"
"A month or two," Smush replied. "Why do ye ask?"
"For the love of mustard, Smush! Stop saying 'ye!'"
"I'll stop saying 'ye' if you stop saying 'for the love of mustard.' Deal?"
"Deal," Mogey agreed. "And I asked about your last bath because it's clearly been so long that you've forgotten all about getting wrinkly fingers. I daresay that's longer than a month or two. In fact... Sir Isaac!"
"Yes, m'lord?" squeaked a mouse wearing glasses who'd just popped out of a hole in the kitchen fireplace: Sir Isaac Shrewton, the mouse with the photographic memory.
"Sir Isaac, how long does it take a person of... erm... moderate-to-fair intelligence to forget a basic truth such as the fact that prolonged water immersion
"Actually sir, most academic research suggests memory has nothing to do with intelligence, although there was one quite intriguing study that--"
"Yadda yadda yadda," Smush interrupted. "Out with it, Shrewton!"
"My best estimate is somewhere between eight months and four years," Sir Isaac Shrewton answered.
"So I missed a couple... hundred baths," Smush said. "So what? My question to you, Shrewton, is how close are we to developing a cure to these unsightly crinkles?"
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