The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2024 Edition - Episode 48

 Mogey was running late, as usual. Smush had stopped by his pal's flat so they could walk over to the cricket match together, but Mogey hadn't quite finished making up the "road snacks" (a half dozen roast beef sandwiches with pickled cucumbers). So that left Smush to wander around the sitting room alone, trying to ignore the sounds of slicing beef and the resulting growling of his tummy (not to mention Mogey's profane shouts when he ran short of pickled cucumbers). 

"I hope that isn't what I think it is..." Smush muttered, peering out Mogey's sitting room window. He rubbed at the window with his thumb and then with his shirt sleeve, but sure enough a smudge besmirched the glass pane. 

Now something important to know about Smush is that he couldn't abide a smudge. It may have had a thing or two to do with his grade school classmates, teachers, and one particularly cruel lunch lady relentlessly calling him "Smudge," "Smudgy," and "Smudge of Fudge," but who knows? 

"Let's get a move-on! I hope you don't mind roast beef-and-slivered almonds," said Mogey, entering the sitting room with a paper packet of sandwiches. "It was the closest thing I had to pickled cucumbers. What in the world are you up to, Smush?"

Smush innocently threw his chisel under the sofa and tried unsuccessfully to tuck his squeegee behind his back. "I, erm, noticed you had a bit of a smudge on your window," he replied.

"That's no smudge," Mogey exclaimed, rushing over to the window. "It's the sacred spot where Albert the Frigid, King of the Chickadees, met his demise."

"Is that why all those birds outside are giving me the stink eye?" Smush asked.

"They come here to pay homage to their fallen king," Mogey nodded. "Some say he saw in my window a promised land for his people. Some say he'd just had a bit too much fermented birdseed. Either way, he flew full speed into the glass, and this became the holiest spot in all chickadeedom. I hope for your sake that chisel of yours isn't much good at degreasing."

The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2024 Edition - Episode 47

 The party had begun to drag. All the classic signs were there: Several guests asked the stablehands to begin readying their coaches. Others were checking their pocketwatches. Even Scrumptious John, the lush postman, carried only a single beverage in his hand and was starting to look around for his mailbag. 

"Do something, Mogey!" Smush urged. 

"You know what this party needs?" Mogey replied, surveying the scene from the upstairs landing. "Some music!"

"But Snooter Malone and his Prickly Seven are already playing their little hearts out," said Smush, gesturing to the hedgehog octet performing in the breakfast nook.

Mogey rummaged in the upstairs closet and brought forth a large instrument case. "I think we need something..." he began, snapping the case open.

"Oh no," Smush responded, his head in his hands.

"...a little more powerful," Mogey concluded. He produced his grandfather's accordion and gave it a nice strong squeeze. The instrument's rich and thunderous sounds immediately drowned out the bored mumbles of the guests (not to mention the Prickly Seven).

"Freebird!" requested Scrumptious John as he abandoned his mailbag in favor of another drink.

The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2024 Edition - Episode 46

 The intensity of the moment hung over the poker table like an aged salami. Also there was a distinct fragrance of aged salami. Smush stared at Mogey. Mogey stared at Count Higgins. Count Higgins stared at Braggadocious Gil, the mole with 20/20 vision.

"I see your hundred dollars," said Count Higgins, "and I raise you another hundred." 

"I see your raise," replied Braggadocious Gil. "Quite literally. Don't know if I've mentioned it, but I'm a mole with 20/20 vision. And as a mole with 20/20 vision, I re-raise you yet another hundred!"

"What about it, Mogey?" Count Higgins inquired. "The action goes to you. Have you enough to continue?"

Mogey peered at his cards, then at his meager stack of poker chips, and then back at his cards. He crammed another slice of aged salami into his mouth. "Smush?" he said with a large and obvious wink. "I'm a bit short. Do you think you could lend me a 'Buck?'"

Smush began to slide a one-dollar chip toward his pal, who scrunched up his neck and shook his head until Smush caught on. "Ah," Smush realized, returning a wink of his own. With eyebrows raised, he withdrew from his collar his most prized family heirloom, a sterling silver necklace featuring a bespectacled 10-point buck wearing a t-shirt with Good Eye Deer splashed across the front. But again Mogey shook his head. 

Finally, Smush reached for the bag at his feet and unzipped it a smidge. Several chickens poked their heads out and Mogey nodded sagely. 

"I call," Mogey uttered at last, "...upon Buck Buck Saint Petersburg and her Foul Fowls!" 

"What's happening?" Count Higgins inquired.

Smush threw the bag into the air and a half dozen chickens burst forth in a spray of feathers, beaks, and claws. They immediately set about eating cards, pecking the players, and causing a general kerfuffle. 

"Let chaos reign, Buck Buck!" Mogey shouted. "I've got the aged salami, Smush - you grab the poker chips!"

The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2024 Edition - Episode 45

 Pat pat pat

Smush's eyes snapped open. He gazed around the circular confines of his tepee wondering what had awoken him, but seeing nothing, he laid his head back down on the furs. 

Pat pat pat

There it was again! Smush untangled himself from the mixture of blankets, stuffed animals, and pizza roll wrappers and poked his head out the tent flap. 

"Is that you, Mogey?" he queried. 

"Indeed! Didn't you hear my knocking?" 

"How many times must I tell you that it is simply not possible to knock on the door of a tepee? And why are you wearing your galoshes?" 

"Puddles," Mogey replied simply, sweeping his arm across the valley. Smush gave his pal a long and indecipherable look. 

"You know something?" he said. "You're exactly right!" He sprinted inside the tepee, pulled on his own galoshes, and proceeded to frolic out into the many pools of water that had accumulated overnight.

Smush found a particularly meaty puddle and was having a good old splash-about when the beat dropped. A blast of house music echoed through the valley, intense enough to vibrate the surface of the water he stood in.

"Erm," Mogey said awkwardly. He had donned a pair of tinted sunglasses and a feather boa. "I think you may have misunderstood. I was referring to Mudd D. Puddles, that DJ who uses galoshes to scratch his records. He's doing a concert t'other side of the valley!"