The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: Quarantine Episode 33

"Extra! Extra! Read all - I doubt it!" Mogey shouted, bursting forth from his office/steam room with a wad of papers balled in his moist fists.

"Don't you mean, 'about it?'" Smush inquired.

"What?"

"You said 'read all - I doubt it.' Don't you mean 'read all about it' instead?"

"I don't make the old-timey newspaperman rules, my friend," Mogey replied. "I just abide by them."

"Arguing about this one is not how I'll be spending my Tuesday," Smush conceded. "How did the first edition of the Chubbo Evening Gazette turn out?"

"Read for yourself," said Mogey, thrusting the sweaty broadsheet into his pal's arms. Mogey had been working nonstop on the launch of the paper, scarcely even leaving his office for six-to-seven meals per day and limiting himself to a mere 90 minutes of America's Funniest Home Videos each night. 

Smush took an appraising look at the publication. He flipped through each page, scanning the content closely to get a true feel for what his friend had accomplished. At last he reached the final page and looked up.

"About 90 percent of the paper seems to be made up of coupons for a place called Stanley's Toilet Hut - what's that all about?" 

"I'm glad you picked up on that!" Mogey replied, blushing at the compliment. "You might think it's a business that sells toilets, right? Wrong! That's Stan's - he said I could call him Stan - that's Stan's genius: It's actually just a hut with a single toilet in it!"

"And people pay to use it?"

"Not if you have one of those coupons from the Chubbo Evening Gazette, you don't!"