The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2026 Edition - Episode 41

Smush sat in the parlour of Barber Slice McFeely's surgery, watching Mogey breathe into a paper bag. His pal hadn't been this much of a wreck since learning that his DVD for Star Trek III: The Search for Spock contained no director's commentary.

"Are you sure this is worth it?" Smush asked.

"Of course... I'm... sure," Mogey panted.

"But getting your pinkies amputated is a big decision!"

"Meh, I never... found 'em... that useful," Mogey replied breathlessly. "I didn't buy... a perfectly good... (though admittedly snug...) set of mittens...just to NOT wear them."

At that moment, Barber Slice McFeely burst into the room wearing a leather apron coated in what was surely a previous patient's gore. He pushed a pair of snorkeling goggles up onto the top of his head and shouted, "Alright, chaps! Are we ready to downsize those paws or what?" 

Mogey nodded nervously.

"Fear not, lad!" Slice McFeely announced, clapping Mogey on the back. "By the time I get done with you, those extra-small mitties are going to feel positively roomy!"

The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2026 Edition - Episode 40

"I think," said Smush one morning around a mouthful of Bran-nuts n' Things™, "that it's high time we got a pet." 

"What kinda critter are you thinking?" Mogey queried. 

"Well now that's a good question, Mogesly. It can't be a dog..."

"Not our style," Mogey agreed.

"Nor a cat."

"Can't have a pet who's smarter than us."

"A pig is out," Smush noted.

"We'd eat the blaggard!" 

"And I couldn't bear to keep a bird in a cage." 

"How melancholy-sweet the songbird's hymn / imprison'd by the cretin's whim," Mogey versified. 

"But I might just have an idea that'll be up our alley," Smush declared. "Meet Stuart Bennigan Plump." 

Smush pulled a small pet carrier from beneath the table. Inside sat a toad wearing a housecoat and slippers, watching a miniature television, and eating a drumstick. (Not some kind of grasshopper drumstick, either - a full-sized chicken leg.)

"Pleased to make your acquaintance," Mogey said warmly.

"Yeah, yeah," Stuart Bennigan Plump replied, waving Mogey away.

"I love him," Mogey told his pal. 

"Hey!" Stuart Bennigan Pump shouted. "You guys got any dippin' sauces in this dump? Or what?"

The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2026 Edition - Episode 39

Mogey and Smush were sitting at the bar in the city's most ostentatious restaurant - Chez Boujee - when a highly-coifed gorilla entered. 

"Psst!" Mogey hissed, so loudly that most of the restaurant turned toward him. 

"Mmmyes?" Smush replied. He was quite distracted by a platter of lobster thermidor travelling past (in fact, the main reason he and Mogey sat at the bar was to obtain a good view of every dish as it left the kitchen).

"I think Johann Gumball just walked in." 

"The legendary food critic?" Smush exclaimed, tearing his eyes away from a steaming duck a l'orange.

"Check it out," Mogey whispered. Johann Gumball settled into a chair (with, it must be said, an epic creak) and removed a pair of spectacles from his waistcoat. 

Just then, the pals' food arrived, and thus their minds became wholly consumed with blanquette de veau, poulet rôti, and a double order of onion rings. By the time they came up for air, Johann Gumball had already finished his entree and was deep in conversation with the maitre d'.

"I think Gumball might've just ordered dessert," Mogey whispered.

"Let me guess," Smush snickered, "bananas foster?"

"Indeed not," Mogey replied. "Johann Gumball famously orders one thing and one thing only for dessert: cherries jubilee."

"Ah yes," said Smush, seeing the waiter bustle past, "here it co-- WAIT! Mogey, that dish is on fire! We've got to do something!"

The pals sprang into action. Smush grabbed a glass of sparkling water and used it to douse the flame. Mogey attempted to shove Johann Gumball out of harm's way. However, as previously stated, Johann Gumball was a gorilla. An admittedly elegant gorilla, but a gorilla just the same. And so Mogey's attempted life-saving tackle resulted in him bouncing off Johann Gumball's furry shoulder and falling to the ground.

"Whatever are you doing?" the food critic demanded.

"Your plate!" Smush shouted. "It was on fire!"

"It's supposed to be on fire," Johann Gumball said. "Cherries jubilee is always served flambe, you nincompoop."

"He's got a point there, Smush," Mogey said, picking himself up off the ground.

"Oh, right," Smush replied, sheepishly turning back to face Johann Gumball. "It's just... I imagined that beautiful pompadour of yours going up in flames and, well, I panicked."

The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2026 Edition - Episode 38

Mogey and Smush were hiking up Bullsbottom Hill for their semi-annual inspection of the Bullsbottom Hill Fire Tower. The fire tower was not theirs to inspect (it was maintained by the Bullsbottom Hill Park Conservancy), but it provided an extremely handy way to see if the smokers at Big Pookins Bar-B-Que were operating, and so the pals took it upon themselves to ensure the tower was always in good nick. 

As they neared the summit of Bullsbottom Hill on this particular afternoon, Mogey and Smush encountered a roly-poly creature clad all over in black fur.

"Look at the cute little baby bear!" Mogey exclaimed.

"Easy, Moges," Smush cautioned, holding his pal back. "You should never approach a bear cub. What if the mother is about?"

"She'd want to see that we were taking good care of her pride and joy, of course!" Mogey responded. He surged forward, scooped up the cub, and gave him a good cuddle.

"FREEZE!" shouted a deep, feminine voice that left no doubt as to its intentions. Mogey and Smush both immediately complied. That's when they heard the grinding clicks of hammers being pulled back on a pair of six-shooters. 

"Please tell me that's not..." Mogey muttered without moving.

"It is," Smush informed his pal, his eyes as wide as yogurt lids. "Big Momma Ursa."

"The Duelin' Bruin?" Mogey said.

"The Duelin' Bruin," Smush confirmed. 

A massive she-bear strode into view, an oversized revolver held high in each of her front paws, a 10-gallon hat perched atop her head.

"The Duelin' Bruin indeed," her deep voice intoned. "Now put the cub down, real slow-like." 

The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2026 Edition - Episode 37

The prune trees that year were heavy with fruit, so Mogey and Smush had a large crop that needed hauling into town. This was good in the sense that the pals depended greatly on prune revenue, but in the time and place where Mogey and Smush lived, the only way they could transport goods was to drag them on a heavy sledge.

Mogey and Smush gazed at the ripped-out catalogue page posted to their wall (which featured the deluxe nut mill they were saving up their prune money to buy), took a swig of powerade, and grabbed the sledge handles. 

No more than a quarter of the way into town, Mogey and Smush stopped to catch their wind. Their hats were soaked in sweat. Their socks were soaked in sweat. And their shirts? Soaked in prune juice and also sweat. 

It was in this compromised condition that they encountered their neighbor, Sir Isaac Graham Bell, who cruised past them in a souped-up Chevrolet El Camino, lime green. 

"Hauling prunes, boys?" Sir Isaac asked, stopping in a cloud of dust.

"You know we are, Sir Isaac," Mogey replied with an air of great annoyance. 

"Say, what is that thing?" Smush added.

"The elco?" Sir Isaac Graham Bell said, slapping the lime green door. "I call her La Belleza Verde."

"No I mean the round black thing on the bottom," Smush clarified.

"The wheels?"

"Wee-uhls." Smush turned the word over in his mouth. "I like 'em. Think we could slap a few of those on a prune sledge?"