"Mogey, I think it's time we got a new clock," Smush said one morning as the two pals sat in the shadows of their behemoth old grandfather clock.
"Why would we do that?" Mogey asked.
"For starters, because this clock only goes to 11. But also because it hasn't ticked a tock in years."
"I don't see the problem."
"Don't you ever get sick of being late to things all the time?" Smush said.
"Not at all," Mogey replied, "and if we get rid of this clock I'll lose the perfect excuse. Everyone will be all 'why are you three hours late to the funeral?' and instead of saying I have a wonderful old clock at home that I can't bring myself to replace, I'll have to just admit I'm lazy. No one will save me a plate of potato salad if I say that! And there is nothing tastier than funeral potato salad. Nothing."
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