The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2024 Edition - Episode 26

Of all Smush's prized possessions, the most prized of all was his '32 Duckbert Crawler. The automobile possessed four on the floor, a baby blue exterior, and no fewer than 13 cupholders. 

One afternoon, Mogey stopped by to find Smush standing in his garage, admiring the Duckbert Crawler as usual.

"I thought you might be in here," said Mogey.

"Indeed?" Smush replied.

"Indeed. Though I don't know how you can just stand around looking at a car--"

"Not just any car. A '32 Duckbert--"

"...Crawler. I know, I know," Mogey muttered. "Anyhow, I brought you one of those milkshakes you like. You know, where I get the shop to replace the milk in your milkshake with... a second milkshake? Here it--WHOOPS!" 

Upon that exclamation, Mogey spilled a hearty cascade of milkshakeshake across the hood of the '32 Duckbert Crawler. To his credit, Smush did not panic. He immediately elbowed Mogey out of the way, took a long draught of what little milkshakeshake remained in the cup, and - in one fluid motion - began to spray the '32 Duckbert Crawler down with a hose. 

"My sincerest apologies," Mogey stammered. "Allow me to assist. Have you got a diaper or something that I can use to dry her off?"

"Please!" Smush scoffed. "A diaper is far too rough for the delicate paint job of a '32 Duckbert Crawler."

"What then? A ShamWow?" 

"I'd sooner see my Gram Gram's spectacles stolen than see a ShamWow touch this vehicle. No, this is a job reserved for a true specialist. Are you ready, GF?"

Smush's chinchilla, Gargoyle Fluffington, saluted solemnly from his cage and fluffed his fur. He knew his proudest moment was nigh. 

The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2024 Edition - Episode 25

"Check it out," Smush announced as he strutted into the milkhouse.

Mogey glanced up from his milking. "What?" he asked.

"Notice anything different about me?"

"New boots?" Mogey suggested.

"You think these ancient wellies that are literally caked in manure are... new boots?" Smush inquired. Mogey nodded eagerly. "Incorrect," Smush said with a sigh. "It's my hair - it finally grew long enough for me to put it in a man-bun!" 

"Congratulations," Mogey said, sniffing the air. "Raisin?"

"How many times must I tell you that man-buns have nothing to do with food?"

"Be that as it may," Mogey replied, smelling more vigorously, "I detect the distinct fragrance of raisin buns. Don't tell me you went to the bunnerie without me?"

"No!" Smush answered, hurriedly wiping his mouth as he searched for a change of subject. "Say, is that a rat you're milking?"

"You bet," Mogey said brightly. "I've acquired a whole mischief of Old World Browns. You will not believe how good rat's milk yogurt tastes!"

The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2024 Edition - Episode 24

 "Mogey," Smush queried, "is that gum you're chewing?"

"You know it," Mogey replied, pulling his sunglasses down in a way that was effortlessly cool, and then popping a gum bubble all over them in a way that was so uncool that it actually appeared to require forethought. 

"Betcha I can guess the flavour."

"Did you just put a 'u' in flavor?" Mogey said as he pickled gum off his lenses. "What a snob. Very well, then - propose some terms for this wager."

"Alright," Smush answered. "If I guess the flavour of your chewing gum in my first three tries, you have to help me sneak your granddad's prize racehorse out of the barn and give me a boost to climb on his back."

"What in the world do you want to ride Hercule for?"

"I've always fancied myself a jockey. This is my chance to find out what could've been! But don't worry, I've got a great prize for you too. If I'm unsuccessful, you get to wear... the vest."

"That leather one with the sea leopards on the lapels?" Mogey exclaimed. "That thing is so rad. You're on!"

"Guess number one," Smush declared. "Licorice."

"No sir," said Mogey, snapping another big bubble.

"Guess number two: Bubblegum."

"Incorrect."

Now Smush appeared nervous. He could see his chances of riding Hercule the race horse slipping away through his fingers. "Tangerine?" he guessed. 

"Not even close!" Mogey replied as he clenched his fist victoriously. "No, this here is a mixture of spruce gum and Bubblicious grape."

"That's not fair!" Smush asserted. "You knew very well I'd never be able to guess that!"

"If you have a gambling problem, I suggest you take it up with 1-800-GAMBLER," Mogey said. "But I will be expecting that vest."

The Abbreviated Adventures of Mogey & Smush: 2024 Edition - Episode 23

 Mogey and Smush had heard legends of a sport known as whitewater rafting. While they weren't familiar with the concept of rapids (or rafts, for that matter), they knew this newfangled form of recreation was thrilling, and so when a rafting outfit opened two towns over, the pals hitched up Mogey's old donkey, Mr. Prune, and hopped into the wagon. 

When they reached RaftBros Unlimited, Mogey and Smush were greeted by an enthusiastically laid-back guide named Bug Muggins. Before they knew it, Bug had ushered the pals into a pair of wetsuits and aboard an inflatable raft. 

"Alright, chieftains," said Muggins as he dipped an oar in the water, "our first intense section is coming up just ahead: it's a steep set of riffles called The Monkey's Abs."

"Sounds pleasant en-- WHAT IN THE WORLD IS THAT?" hollered Smush.

"That'll be The Monkey's Abs. Ain't she a beaut?" Bug Muggins answered.

"WHY IS THE WATER ALL... ANGRY AND WHITE?" Mogey cried fearfully.

"Chill out, pig snout," Bug Muggins said calmly. "It's whitewater rafting, remember?"

"You meant that..." Smush began. "LITERALLY?" he and Mogey exclaimed in unison. 

"Right on!" said Bug Muggins joyfully. 

Mogey and Smush exchanged looks of disbelief before they both leapt from the raft, swam to shore, and didn't stop until they - and Mr. Prune - were safely ensconced in an AstroBurger outpost, taking in refreshment to recover from the harrowing ordeal.